My husband wondered why "Pity Sex" and "7-11 Sex" didn't make the list. (I'll leave it up to you to define those!)
- The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex. This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.
- The 2nd kind of sex is called: Kitchen Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for a short time and you are so horny you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.
- The 3rd kind of sex is called: Bedroom Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.
- The 4th kind of sex is called: Hallway Sex. This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When you pass each other in the hallway, you both say "screw you."
- The 5th kind of sex is called: Religious Sex, which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun in the afternoon and Nun at night.
- The 6th kind is called Courtroom Sex. This is when you cannot stand your spouse any more. He/she takes you to court and screws you right in front of everyone.
- And last, but not least, the 7th kind of sex is called: Social Security Sex. You get a little each month, but not enough to live on.
Friday, August 25, 2006
The Seven Stages of Sex
I bet that title got your attention, right? I don't know if this true or not, but my sister-in-law claims that on a recent Oprah show Dr. Phil defined the seven stages (or kinds) of sex as follows: